We begin in ignorance. Without knowing how little we know, we have complete confidence. A good example of “ignorance is bliss.” A great place to be, but fragile, it does not last. Reality sets in.We begin to learn. We start to see how little we know, how little control we have, how lost we are. We can get hurt, and perhaps we do. And something happens to that confidence. A dose of reality pops our bubble of bliss. We find ourselves feeling exposed, unprotected…. And scared.
Confidence, or lack there of, is something I deal with regularly in both my riders and myself. In my riders, I can asses their level of horsemanship often based on their confidence. The complete beginner will come to the riding experience full of excitement, and without fear. They have nothing to fear yet. One who has spent some time, unfortunately this can be just one bad ride, will come in fear. They have minimal knowledge, but a healthy dose of fear. Those who have spent plenty of time riding, and time studying the horse, return to self-assurance, though one at this level still must be warned of overconfidence – the false sense of knowing enough that can block us from realizing how much we still have to learn, or prevent us from being open to learning more. This is the "good enough, it works for me" syndrome. Then the highest levels of horsemen I observe, and strive to be like. I have a long ways to go. They come in a quiet, confident air of humility. They have an abundance of knowledge and understanding, but part of that knowledge is the fact that they know there is always more to learn.
So, how do we achieve confidence?
Let me tell you, I have to work on this one regularly in everything I do. I was not born with the comfortable ego of many. Mine is frail and wavering. For years, this bothered me. I felt inferior because of it. But what I have found was that this very trait, insecurity, is what is ultimately allowing me to grow into a good horseman.
The only way I have found one can overcome fear and insecurity is through knowledge. Confidence, and I don’t mean a false sense of over inflated ego, but a true sense of quiet understanding, comes from one thing: knowledge. The more knowledge we have, the more our fears and insecurities are replaced by facts. We learn to understand, and are able to act with positive assurance because we know what works and why.
Mind you, since the best horsemen I know are always learning and growing, we must remain with an open mind, and constantly adjust, grow, and expand this base of knowledge.
And the process of replacing fear with knowledge is an enjoyable journey. We can’t learn if we aren’t willing to try. What we can do is enjoy learning. It means being with our horse, growing with our horse, and growing in our hearts and minds.
We do learn by listening. (Likewise do we miss out when we don’t listen.) One great horseman said, “Listen to the horse. He’ll tell you when you find the right answer.” For those of us desperately seeking right answers but without direct human guidance (no mentor, teacher, trainer, etc.), the horse ultimately is our best educator, and yes, will be the one to let us know when we by chance stumble on the right way of doing things.
But how do we know where to begin, what to try first? What action to take to give the horse the chance of approval or disapproval, acceptance or suggestion or revision? We are not born with this knowledge. We must strive to ascertain and achieve.
I believe a good trainer, teacher or mentor would be the best first step. They have already a base of information to share. But be warned. We can not learn it all from one person. All we learn is their way. There are many other ways. Be open. Take what knowledge you can, what works for your and your horse then and there, and be willing to move on, to try new things, to listen to others. (This is, or should be, what the best of trainers and teacher have done.) No well rounded education comes from one book.
Without a trainer/teacher/mentor, as I have been, how do we learn? Where do we begin? Clinics are one possibility, but I have seen more damage done for the insecure (not uncommonly due in part to the rudeness of the auditors than anything else). Clinics are not for everyone. If you choose this route, know what you are getting into. Auditors are a pet peeve of mine, folks who in the safety of the stands feel they are in a position to throw insults and advice at will. No one, and I mean no one, paid to learn from one not brave enough to even participate. Learn to ignore these folks and see them for what they are.
For me, books, articles and DVDs have been the best teacher. They are available even way up here on my mountain. Who do I watch and read? Everyone! Every book, magazine and DVD I can afford each year written by any horseperson of any discipline on any level. If I can not find at least one thing to learn from each, chances are I am not really watching/listening/reading.
Everyone, every experience, and every horse present an opportunity for learning if our minds are open enough to absorb. It is only when we look at life with a closed mind (“I already know that…”) that we miss the obvious lessons.
So, I strive to learn more with every encounter, every ride, every book and every DVD. And with each small piece, every tiny tidbit of information that I absorb, I find a little trace of insecurity is magically replaced with an equal amount of confidence.
If I do not seek knowledge, my insecurities have every right to remain. But the equation is simple. Knowledge brings confidence. A real, solid true confidence, like a foundation that can forever be build upon.
I read recently something like this:
We must do something we have never done before
To get where we have never been before
We must try new methods if we wish to achieve new results.
I have yet to find a horseman who could not learn more.
An open mind is essential for the growth of the rider, the understanding of the horse, the relation of the student/teacher, and an appreciation for the fullness and beauty of life.
We do learn by listening. (Likewise do we miss out when we don’t listen.) One great horseman said, “Listen to the horse. He’ll tell you when you find the right answer.” For those of us desperately seeking right answers but without direct human guidance (no mentor, teacher, trainer, etc.), the horse ultimately is our best educator, and yes, will be the one to let us know when we by chance stumble on the right way of doing things.
But how do we know where to begin, what to try first? What action to take to give the horse the chance of approval or disapproval, acceptance or suggestion or revision? We are not born with this knowledge. We must strive to ascertain and achieve.
I believe a good trainer, teacher or mentor would be the best first step. They have already a base of information to share. But be warned. We can not learn it all from one person. All we learn is their way. There are many other ways. Be open. Take what knowledge you can, what works for your and your horse then and there, and be willing to move on, to try new things, to listen to others. (This is, or should be, what the best of trainers and teacher have done.) No well rounded education comes from one book.
Without a trainer/teacher/mentor, as I have been, how do we learn? Where do we begin? Clinics are one possibility, but I have seen more damage done for the insecure (not uncommonly due in part to the rudeness of the auditors than anything else). Clinics are not for everyone. If you choose this route, know what you are getting into. Auditors are a pet peeve of mine, folks who in the safety of the stands feel they are in a position to throw insults and advice at will. No one, and I mean no one, paid to learn from one not brave enough to even participate. Learn to ignore these folks and see them for what they are.
For me, books, articles and DVDs have been the best teacher. They are available even way up here on my mountain. Who do I watch and read? Everyone! Every book, magazine and DVD I can afford each year written by any horseperson of any discipline on any level. If I can not find at least one thing to learn from each, chances are I am not really watching/listening/reading.
Everyone, every experience, and every horse present an opportunity for learning if our minds are open enough to absorb. It is only when we look at life with a closed mind (“I already know that…”) that we miss the obvious lessons.
So, I strive to learn more with every encounter, every ride, every book and every DVD. And with each small piece, every tiny tidbit of information that I absorb, I find a little trace of insecurity is magically replaced with an equal amount of confidence.
If I do not seek knowledge, my insecurities have every right to remain. But the equation is simple. Knowledge brings confidence. A real, solid true confidence, like a foundation that can forever be build upon.
I read recently something like this:
We must do something we have never done before
To get where we have never been before
We must try new methods if we wish to achieve new results.
I have yet to find a horseman who could not learn more.
An open mind is essential for the growth of the rider, the understanding of the horse, the relation of the student/teacher, and an appreciation for the fullness and beauty of life.